Recently one of my articles about feminism where I used the decal on the left received a readership of some considerable numbers in the USA. Apart from a large number of comments, I also received emails. One in particular struck me.
The email was from a woman in the USA (we shall call her Jane Doe) who is an undercover feminist. I replied to Jane asking if I could publish her letter anonymously. Her response both pleased and shocked me. Jane said yes, I could publish her letter, but she also said:
Plus, I don’t really need prospective employers dismissing my resume just because I’ve been perceived as a ‘radical feminist’.
Are American employers so sexist? I do hope not!
Here is what Jane wrote to me.
I don’t know if I really want my experience shared, but if you like my blog posts at all, feel free to share them/those/my blog.
I feel really isolated and lonely. It’s not like I’m surrounded by feminists first hand. Sometimes I get so mad about gender inequality, it makes me sick.
I just lost my best friend of 20 years because I had introduced my feminist Facebook page for my Blogger account to her 9 yr. old daughter. Maybe it was “wrong” of me to do but I’m just puzzled because she said if maybe all the “feminist bs” hadn’t happened in the 1950s (? okay…) so many kids wouldn’t be growing up fatherless here in the States. And maybe it was myopic on my side but the 9 yr. old was also my goddaughter and my friend – her mother, a stripper, has been beaten, gang raped, estranged from this child’s father since he’s a mentally and verbally abusive crack addict…I don’t know why she would be so anti-feminist thought despite having so many negative experiences at the influence of men. I just wanted to allow my goddaughter to investigate feminist thought thinking it could be no worse for her than what Miley Cyrus pulled at the MTV VMAs. Especially since my goddaughter is a big fan of Miley. I feel like she’s too young for that type of exposure and I’m distraught that Miley Cyrus is too busy cashing in to realize that a lot of young girls that idealize her from her Hannah Montana days still aren’t yet old enough to separate the distinction of young vs. “old” Miley.
I wish someone had tried to introduce me to feminist thought at a young age. Instead I was denied Legos since they were a “boy’s toy”.
I read some of your posts today for the first time and I wanted to thank you for writing them. As I sit here sniffling and sipping on my “Mike’s Hard Pink Lemonade” (of course seasonal only for Breast Cancer Research) I don’t feel so alone, or crazy, or misguided.
I look forward to discovering more of what you write and this site.
I wish I could sit down with you and drink some tea or something with you and just listen to you speak.
I’ve decided to not have children because of the ways world events are unfolding.
Again, I just wanted to thank you. Please don’t ever stop writing. Because you’re not alone either.
She has since share some other thoughts with me, however I suggest you visit Jane’s site and read her thoughts for yourself.
Jane also said, in her second email:
In America, we are all very isolated from each other. Geographical distance and mismatched schedules are a real problem. Also a lot of peoples priorities vary due to varying ignorance and personal experience.
As I do not live in America, I cannot confirm or deny Jane’s perspective, but I suggest if this is one person’s experience of being a woman in this century, whether in the USA or any country, it is probably the experience of others as well. This ties in to exactly what I was saying in my article that lead to this (link at the top of this article): we need help out there for grass roots women TODAY.
Note: I have not seen exactly what Miley Cyrus did, I do know it started a media storm. I am not personally commenting on Miley in any way.
- I’m not a Feminist but… (experimentalcriticism.com)
- The battle of feminist ideologies
- Feminism can be frivolous fun
- Gender equality is “usurping the natural order of things”?
- So what if male and female brains are different?
- Dear Max Tomlinson